A lawyer calls his client to tell him about his fee schedule.
“Alright,” the lawyer says looking through his papers. “You owe me $1000 down and $417.58 cents each month for the next thirty-six months.
“What! That sounds like a car payment schedule,” retorted the client.
“Your right. It’s mine.”
While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting and old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,”Are there any gators around here?!”
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<br FFXI Gil />About halfway there he asked the guy,”How’d guy,”How’d you get rid of the gators?”
“We didn’t do nothin’,” the city of villains infamy beachcomber ao credits said.
“The sharks got ‘em.”
Law of Cat Inertia
A cat at rest will tend anarchy online credits to remain at rest, unless acted upon by some outside force - such as the opening of cat food, or a nearby scurrying mouse.
Law of Cat Motion
A cat will move in a straight line, unless there is a really good reason to change direction.
Law of Cat Magnetism
All blue blazers and black sweaters attract cat hair in direct proportion to the darkness of the fabric.
Law of Cat Thermodynamics
Heat flows from a warmer to a cooler body, except in the case of a cat, in which case all heat flows to the cat.
Law of Cat Stretching
A cat will stretch to a distance proportional eve online isk to the length of the nap just taken.
Law of Cat Sleeping
All cats must sleep with people whenever possible, in a position as uncomfortable for the people involved, and as comfortable as possible for the cat.
Law of Cat Elongation
A cat can make her body long enough to reach just about FFXI Gil any counter top that has anything remotely interesting on it.
Law of Cat Obstruction
A cat city of villains infamy must lay on the floor in city of villains infamy such a position to obstruct buy ao credits the maximum amount of human foot traffic.
Law of Cat Acceleration
A cat will accelerate at a buy ao credits constant rate, until he gets good and ready to stop.
Law of Dinner Table Attendance
Cats must attend all meals when anything good is served.
Law of Rug Configuration
No rug may remain in its naturally flat state for very long.
Law of Obedience Resistance
A cat’s resistance varies in proportion to a human’s desire for her to do something.
First Law of Energy Conservation
Cats know that energy can neither be created nor destroyed and will, therefore, use as little energy as possible.
Second Law of Energy Conservation eve online isk
Cats also know that energy can only be stored by a lot of napping.
Law of Refrigerator Observation
If a FFXI Gil cat watches a refrigerator long enough, someone buy ao credits will come along and take out something good to eat.
Law of Electric Blanket Attraction
Turn on an electric blanket and a cat will jump into bed at anarchy online credits the speed of light.
Law of Random Comfort Seeking
A cat anarchy online credits wi
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